In His Hands

Most days, I think I am doing okay with the wait. But I think I am just fooling myself.

My first clue, I welled up with tears while working out on an elliptical at a gym. And then realized I was going much faster than normal b/c somehow that would get me to her quicker.

I just sit in her room for no other reason than to wonder who she is and what it will feel like to finally have her in my arms and in our home.

Today, we heard word from her orphanage. We were able to ask 10 questions about our Sugar Plum. It was SO hard to narrow it down! The answers came today. The answers probably could have been anything and I would have still jumped for joy. Just the thought of communication between them and us made the distance seem smaller. Praise God, her medical updates seem great!

With each of my pregnancies we were trying to slow down labor. The wait was all about keeping the baby inside to grow. The countdown felt in reverse. Well, this time around the days that go by are days of her life we are missing. Like her first steps, her first words, etc. We wonder and pray that she is getting enough to eat, sunshine on her face, a cuddle or a kiss. I am constantly asking for faith to believe that God is caring for her. Why must I think that I must see to believe?

Honestly some days are so busy that it's not til I hit the pillow at night that I wonder how she is. Somehow it's comforting to realize I only missed the hours she was asleep and that her day is just beginning.